Kiss Off (Music: Nilsen, words: Angelskår)

 

Waiting for a feeling to materialize

laughing and crying is the same release    

the radio is playing that song that you like         

a young band trying to find its feet

I know it’s probably not my phrase

but don’t make me wait                                                                                

trust me nothing will change

and tomorrow’s all there is

the rest is space                                                                                                  

that you’d want to fill with a better world

a better job and a better girl

a purpose or just something that works

for more than a while

 

you know how it sounds

but you don’t know how it feels

laughing and crying is the same release

you sing about distance

while you’re closing her in

I love you, I used to, I’m sure I did                            

but all our memories will fade

and when they are gone 

who cares about the marks that we made?                                                

and while our bodies grow old

in my mind we’re still

the toughest kids on our street

still waiting for life to agree

and I had you, so you must have had me                                                  

back at seventeen                                                                                            





I know it’s probably not my phrase

but don’t make me wait

trust me, nothing will change

and though I cannot feel my years

they’re all here

in my songs to you

and I know that when my number is up

when every song has been sung                                             

and every thought has been fought                                   

I’ll be counting on you to be here                                         

to kiss me off

(Looking for) Truth in the Vocal Booth (Nilsen/Angelskår/Lyseid)



Fifteen and wide eyed

flew to Cleveland on my own

met my buddy Brandon on the ground 

Guns ‘n’ Roses

I bought their tape down at the mall              

just two weeks after it came out 

 

but B said; listen here is a song

with a different mood

it wasn’t Mötley or Aerosmith

but some english dude                                               

it sounded sweet, it sounded rude

Strangeways here we come



I am such a phony

I always claim this is who I am

until I find another you

I gave up skating

looking for truth inside a cave  

surfing the new wave, all I know is don’t know nothing



what I am is what I am

are you what you are?

I’m no bohemian like her

me, I try too hard

thought I loved her voice

thought I loved her wit

still I only sang that guitar



I’ve been listening to singers all along

looking for truth in the vocal booth 

and heaven knows I’m miserable now

when words can’t tell you who you are  

when you’re running out of choices

you don’t need the voices

just the weep of a guitar



I keep getting younger

man, I used to be so old

at least sometimes that’s how I feel

I miss Van Halen

I miss the fun, I miss the girls

and I don’t care if it’s not for real



things just haven’t been the same

since that suicide note                                        

I don’t want a peek backstage

I want to get the joke

so while you burn out I fade away

into the days that used to be

-

It Doesn’t Matter, It’s Ok (Angelskår)

I was always able to find a way

to get things done

before she came

I’d go for a run and clear my head

these days I lose my breath just turning around in bed

if I come out the other end

I’m going to need a friend


I was always told to do my best

without too much fuss

to be someone you could trust

I wish I knew just what she wants

for every move she makes I’m looking for a cause

like the universe will have to adjust

to what she does


it doesn’t matter what I do

it doesn’t matter what I say

it doesn’t matter what I thought we could be, it’s too late

if she’s not going to wait


I always thought I was someone else

someone good

I was never this afraid

my heart it won’t listen to my head

me, I keep repeating what I should have said

I’ve always known how to turn a phrase

when it’s too late


it doesn’t matter what I do

it doesn’t matter what I say

it doesn’t matter if I turn up too late, it’s ok

if she’s not going to wait

-

The Singer (Angelskår) 

 

You always keep me waiting

One foot out the door

and you refuse to let me know

Just who you are

And who you were

Before you took me on

 

You leave before I wake up

You text me when I call

And you refuse to let me know

Just where you are

And who you’re with

While I’m on my own

 

A little black cloud in a dress

A little black cloud in high heels

And though you’re showing me the steps

You never dance for me

 

But I’ll come back to you

Like I always do

I’ll come back to you

 

You ask me to be patient

But you don’t know what it means                             

To hold on to anything                                                                                          

I don’t why I let you do these things to me

 

As I watch you sleeping

I still wonder where you are

And who you dream about, tonight                                               

If you’re alone, if you’re still stoned

If you remember why

 

but that song you so believe in

It should be in a different key

And those words you keep repeating                   

Is an apology                                                   

 

Saying: I’ll come back to you

Like I always do

I’ll come back to you

-

Lucy   (Angelskår/Lyseid)

 

In the evening when the day goes down

Lucy leaves the city lights

stands and watches, with her coat pulled around,

how the neon hits the skies

sometimes she thinks she knows him

sometimes his outline’s just a blur

but he’s always there on her mind



she finds a window seat on the subway home

places her handbag by her feet

re-reads a message on her phone

a little something to keep him real

sometimes she thinks she sees him

hears the turnstile click behind a blur

as if he’s homebound just like her

sometimes she thinks she loves him

sometimes his outline’s just a blur

but he’s always there on her mind



all the changing faces passing through

they never bothered her at all

they’re just a backdrop that ties the light

into patterns on the wall

sometimes she thinks she hears him

when the handle turns on their front door

as if he’s there, like before



when you come back home

when you turn the key

is he still there with you?

Is he within reach?

-

Patricia (Angelskår /Lyseid)


Do you ever think of me up there

when you’re God knows where

with your eyes closed in front of the crowd?

Would you pull me up on stage if I

came to your show tonight?

Would you still get me high backstage?

Do I remember summer rain

that sweet metallic taste

the chemicals that made us stay awake?



I didn’t really get it then

but it struck my mind the other day:

I think you’re right about «the leaving»-part

but you’re wrong about «the running away»



I’m still working on the could-have-beens

of you and I, I mean

what if Patricia hadn’t chosen that night?

You told me once that if we ran away

and never spoke her name

then the world would fall back into place



but I rely on muscle memory

onstage wine and irony

if you somehow got the best of me

put it out there in when my recollection’s slow



I’m in the corner by the bar, tonight

you played a song of mine

with contorted chords and words shuffled around

me, I don’t mind you changing it

rearranging it

kinda like the way you’re slowing it down



your introduction it was eloquent

but you didn’t write that song on the road

sure, I agree with the sentiment

I’ll be waiting where the flightcases load



she lived right across the street from us

and her mum still wakes up insane

just to ask: will she back again?

Now, what am I supposed to say?



So we’ll be dining with the could-have-beens

you & I, I mean

and though our words need time to unfold

there are moments worth remembering

I hope you’re good at it

’cause there is so much I wish I didn’t know

and that’s why you’re not coming back

and that’s why I can never leave

but Patricia would have that loved that song

just the way you’re playing it to me

-










Another Year (Angelskår/Lyseid)

They were working together in the garden on a lazy, warm weekend

he was tending to the roses, when she noticed how his hair had thinned

Maybe it was just the thought of time

Half empty hour glasses they’re not granting us a second try

Suddenly the changes seemed so small

All her aspirations, all her dreams, felt like she’d spent them all



Good girl gone bad

Good girl gone bad

Good girl gone bad

Without a word



There was a time when all my dreams they seemed so feasible and real

It’s not that long ago but now I can’t recall just how it feels

Yesterday –«we» were all I knew

Painted in the present tense, I think in the terms of me and you

These fancies they tend to grow away

But don’t you ever get the feeling we‘re running out of days?



Good girl gone bad

Good girl gone bad

Good girl gone bad

you must have heard



They sat together on the grass and watched the evening sky grow dark

She asked him for a cigarette, and there and then laid bare her aching heart

«We’ll work it out», he said and pulled her close

She heard the pressure in her chest release a quiet: «I suppose»

Stuck between his jaws a trembling sound

He felt he had to ask: does this mean we’re on shaky ground?



Good love gone bad

Good love gone bad

Good love gone bad

I’m out of words



You always said: wait around for me

You always said: wait around for me

You always said you’d wait a while and see

You always said: wait around for me

I thought that things would sort themselves if I could only clear my head

It took another year of disappearing till I found home again

sometimes he still asks me if I’m true

So I found a way to answer him without having to tell the truth

Your mind it is a stranger, that’s the phrase he used

now I found a way to look at him, that won’t belie the words I choose:



«Good girl gone bad»

-


Napkin poetry (Angelskår / Lyseid)

I came to feel the lemonheads

Or whatever you wanted to feel   

When Juliana played the bass guitar

And the smoke was too thick to breathe



they came on late, looking like they’d rather be at home

that was fashionable back then  

Evan wore his favorite T that I recalled from posters on her wall

Some country dude from way back when



I knew she’d be there anyway

So I didn’t care to call

A few nervous drinks and then we headed back

To the posters on her wall



Two more weeks of school and then we’re off forever

You might have told me not to wait

I wrote napkin poetry on days skipping towards the summer

another leap of faith



Fall brings out the best in me

The cold resides inside my chest

When the leaves pile up in heaps around the trees

Then I am at my best



But no amount of calm can me forget what I want    

Or the chances that I blew

So while I wait for winter and for darkness to arrive

I long for something new



I spin the record patiently

I like the fact it’s not too long

Juliana plays the bass guitar

And Evan still cares for his songs



So I write napkin poetry but never about her

Or the way we ought to be

Josephine she slipped into those summernights 

but Alison’s still happening to me

-

I’ve been here before you (Angelskår)

Come to me with your silliest dream

Come to me when you’re hopeful

Come to me just to disagree

I’ll be at your disposal



Come to me right after she leaves

when it feels like you can’t make it past her

sweet summer girls they leave no guarantees

and they don’t always pick up to answer



And everybody knows

At one point you’ll expect me to show you how

Before you give the the dream a go

When it feels like you’re made for that rock’n’roll



Come to me when you’re down on your knees

And this world is more than you can handle

Come to me, let me know how it feels

Let’s see if we can find another angle



Feels like I should know

If you were right to expect just a little more

when you have to let her go

And no earthly reason seems good enough



I’ve been here before

I’ve been here before you



Come to me when you no longer believe

In all the things that I taught you

Come to me, let yourself in

Stay for as long as you want to



I've been here before you

-


It’s easier to sing (Angelskår)

I can make her listen in a song

I can make her keep her promises, right her every wrong

I can make her understand

But it’s the only way I can



I can make her call me at first light

And instead of saying: «sorry I just can’t make it tonight»

She’ll arrive on time

no distractions on her mind



This is what I do, honey

I don’t want to pick a fight

It’s just easier to sing

Than to wait for you to call me back, tonight



Other men, you’ll leave them all alone

Instead of listening to a heart that keeps proving you wrong

Time and time again

You’ve got to give it a chance to mend



I can make you love me in a song

I can make you keep your promises and regain some control

And though I can’t make it true

I might come across to you



No song is just a song, honey

it carries heart, it lends a hand

Cause it’s easier to sing

Than to wait around for you to understand

It’s just easier to sing

Than to wait for you to love me as I am